All Too Much

To The Man In The Moon

Dear Dad,

I am floundering. I feel like I am on the verge of a breakdown. I am trying to keep it all together but it feels like I am holding onto a million balloon in the middle of a tornado, and I am getting whipped around into a frenzy at very turn. My sanity is waning. I just need a break.

Mom had her surgery and is supposed to come home tomorrow. She did so well, you would be so proud of her. I can only imagine how hard it is being so far away from everyone and having so much pain. I feel horrible for complaining about my problems. I have no room. Through all of this I feel like a horrible daughter and an even worse mom.

I feel like my frustration and stress is bleeding through and I am passing it onto Liam. Which is the worst thing I could possibly do. I am sick with it. He has been so cranky the last couple of days, with today being the worst. He has had to deal with so much crap and his schedule continuing to change everyday. He is doing the best he can. We all are, but I think its taking its toll. Tomorrow he has physical therapy and then we have to make the drive down to get mom. I am already coming down with something again. I have this lump in my throat its sore and not even cough drops are helping. Liam has had a cough and I am hoping its nothing more, but with all of us running ragged I wouldn't doubt it if we both end up ill.

I am praying for strength. I am hoping I will be able to handle all this shit. I am praying that I can do better. I hope you and God are listening.

Love

Sondra

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